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Chuck: You're gonna come down here before the black wolf swallows my brain! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!

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Dr. Buddy Rydell: Now then we need to go over some ground rules. You are to refrain from any any acts of violence including verbal assault and vulgar hand gestures. You may not use rage enhancing substances, such as caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, crack cocaine, slippy-flippy's, jelly stingers, trick sticks, bing bangs or flying willards.
Dave Buznik: How 'bout fiddle-faddels?
Dr. Buddy Rydell: Under my supervision. Also, if you are unable to stop masterbating please, do so without the use of any pornographic images depicting quote, unquote 'angry sex.' That having been said, I'm a pretty good guy and I think you'll be pleasantly surprised how much fun we can have together.
Dave Buznik: Geez, without slippy-flippy's or angry masterbating I don't see how that's possible.
Dr. Buddy Rydell: Sarcasm is anger's ugly cousin... from now on, unacceptable.

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Dave Buznik: Hi, I'm glad I'm not the only one in anger management.
Bobby Knight: What? I don't need anger management! I thought this was sexaholics anonymous!
Dave Buznik: Uh, I think that's down the hall.
Bobby Knight: Oh SCREW THIS!

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Here's mine.
Man: Did you just call that man Buddy Rydell?
Buddy: Yes. I'm Buddy Rydell.
Man: Some jeark named Buddy Rydell left this (pulls out business car) on what remains of my car!
Buddy: Yes! For insurance purposes!
(Then the man says some stuff pulls out a gun. Points at buddy then other guy cause he spoke out trying to save him. His girlfriend says no! He says he has to do this then he says how he's sick of men like him.)
Main character(can't remember name): May I just ask one question? Who's that pretty girl in that mirror there?
Man: What mirror? Where?