Continue posting your best jokes here!

Thread Edition: 9
Previous Thread: 8.

This message was edited by ShortMan on Oct 12 2008.

Your latin is all wrong. You've said that this is the 9th edition of this thread, and yet you have written in latin 'Joke Thread No. 8'

Yeah sorry. My keyboard isn't working properly. Fixing it now.

if a blonde and a brunette fell off a building which would hit the ground first...?






the brunette cause the blonde would have to stop and ask for directions.....! lol

quote ShortMan

Yeah sorry. My keyboard isn't working properly. Fixing it now.

Sorry to be pedantic about it, but it just looks nicer when everything is done properly

My mate told me this one.
There were 3 blond girls stuck on a island and they each had one wish, the first blond girl said i wish to be intelligent she turned into a brunette and swam off the island the second on said she wished to be more intelligent than the last,she turned into a ginger built a boat and sail off the island, The last she she wish she was the most intelligent out of the 3,she turned into a man and took the bridge off the island.

A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off.

"How did this happen?" the emergency room doctor asked her.

Well, I was trying to commit suicide, the blonde replied.

"What?" sputtered the doctor. "You tried to commit suicide by shooting your finger off?"

"No, Silly!" the blonde said. "First I put the gun to my chest, and I thought: I just paid $6,000.00 for these breast implants, I'm not shooting myself in the chest."

"And then?" asked the doctor.

"Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought: I just paid $3000.00 to get my teeth straightened, I'm not shooting myself in the mouth."

"And then?"

"Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger."

A rottweiler, a Doberman and an Great Dane are in the waiting room of a vets.

The Great Dane starts conversation up, and asks the other two what they are there for.

The Rottweiler says with a sad face that he was waiting outside the shops when some little girl came up to pet me, and he bit her arm off.

With a sad look, the great dane asked if he was to be put down. The answer was yes.

The Doberman said that he was a guard dog on a farm, and when a burglar came calling, he killed the Burglar, then ate him.

The Great Dane asked again if he was to be put down. The answer was yes, again.

The Great Dane said he was here, because he saw his mistress bending over the bath, stark naked. He then gave her a good old seeing to.

With sad looks on their faces, the other dogs asked if he was to be put down as well.

"No, I'm here to get my nails clipped."

a friend also told me this one


Theres a blonde,a brunet and a ginger marooned away from civlisation on a island.

Their is a island with civilisation on it .


Its thirty miles swim away .

The brunet swims 12 miles and get tired and drownds.

The ginger swims 14 miles then gets tired and drowneds....

Then the blonde swims 15 miles but she gets tired and swims back....!





lol

quote pearl_girl

a friend also told me this one


theres a blonde,a brunet and a ginger marooned away from civlisation on a island. their is a island with civilisation on it . its thirty miles swim away the brunet swims 12 miles and get tired and drownds.the ginger swims 14 miles then gets tired and drowneds....yhen yhe blonde swims 15 miles but she gets tired and swims back....!

How do you know if you have a high sperm-count?

quote Musey_86

How do you know if you have a high sperm-count?

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!

GUFFAW GUFFAW GUFFAW!

*waits for someone to call me fag*

What do you call a virgin girl in Collie?

Someone who can run faster then their brother.

(Collie is inbred town near me)