I have 2 controls, one was programmed into the wii when I got it. I can't connect the second control, if I follow the instructions, the lights never seem to stop flashing to tell me it is connected but it knocks the first control out at the same time so I have to go back and re-program the first one.
Any help appreciated, what I have been doing is pushing the red button in the battery compartment of the control and the red button in the wii at thr same time. I have sat ther for over five minutes and it just won't tune in.

Try pressing the home button on the remote that's working and go to "Wii remote setting" or whatever its called. Then, go to RECONNECT and then press the 1 and 2 buttons on both remotes.

If that doesn't work you could unplug your Wii, plug it back in and keep on trying to connect like you were before.